There are enough ‚mummy blogs‘ out there depicting a life of contented maternal fairytale-like bliss. And whilst I lament my inability to sew, my lacklustre attitude towards baking and the fact that our guest room still looks more like a guest room than the beautiful nurseries on Pinterest, I love reading them all.
All the same, it’s nice to read about the harder issues surrounding motherhood. Like what about the suddenly missing working life and persona? I love my job and still can’t quite imagine what it will be like to not be at work. And whilst working life brings its share of stress and doses of unpleasantness (like night-shifts) it has always been rewarding and contributed to my overall happiness with life.
Edition F is a super on-line German magazine founded by 2 women and created for women serving as a portal for opinion and debate over a diverse range of issues as well as a place for networking. (Sadly just in the German language).
During early pregnancy, one of the most reassuring and sensible articles I read on how to have a relaxed pregnancy was from one of Edition F’s contributors. Now Teresa with a 2-month baby by her side, Teresa writes about the different facets of being a mother. And revealingly about her missing work life and what that means to her. It’s worth a read for any German reader.
In Germany, this stands out particularly. Whilst most of my friends in England are back at work within a year of giving birth (willingly or unwillingly), many women here – including friends and acquaintances – take full advantage of the full 3 years of maternity leave and mothers going back to work do so with a feeling of guilt. In fact, there’s even a word to describe these mothers: ‚Rabenmutter‚. This can be loosely translated as ‚cruel or uncaring‘ mother and tellingly doesn’t have a direct counterpart in the English language. I’ve often enough heard people comment upon why you bother to have kids, if you are planning to put them into daycare.
I firmly believe that each family should decide on its own concept, and should be left to do this without being judged one way or the other. Just as I fully acknowledge that expecting a baby is far removed from actually having one and don’t know myself if I will think differently in a few months time.